Elizabeth's Diary 5-20-26 Night Time

Good late evening, I maid some Honey Tea tonight, my Cold is Finally Breaking, it's Strange I Finally Feel Clearheaded, the Rain does Splish and Splash but it Goes Away in a Flash. I look Forward to Sailing Towards Tomorrow. I did Learn something rather Interesting about myself, even in Weakness I have my Mental Fortitude, hence why I tend to Feel Better Psychologically. I am Self Aware far more than Most may Seem to Understand and my Self Determinism is what Matters the Most. I did Notice that I now have 170 Subscribers on my YouTube. I prefer to have a Smaller Audience as it tends to be Easier for me to Handle. I Create because I Desire to Create, the Idea of Fame Frightens me. The Bible does say to have Humility. Not to mention, I Despise the Sin of Envy as it makes me Literally Sick and to Know Folks Covet what I have makes me Very Upset. It's Mainly the Concept of Want without Actually Improving your Life to Reach the Same Point of Happiness. I Suppose that's why I Hate Copycats above all Else. If you Truly Desire to be Like me, then Improve your Life and Embrace your Talents to their Fullest Potential. I do Apologize about this Entry being Later than Expected as Violet Wants me to Cuddle with her. She Truly is my Best Friend in the Animal Kingdom, I Love Cats, more than Humans to be Honest with you. Dogs on the Otherhand I tend to be Afraid of, mainly due to Each One wanting to Attack me. Dogs are Beasts that Judge Passiveness and I can be quite Submissive and Delicate hence why the Support Group used to Sic their Dog on me Essentially. Whenever I'd Would Try to Speak Up, they Loosened the Leash a bit, I recall the Meeting at the Room in the Episcopal Church's Tower. When I Inquired about HRT, I was Told to "Just be Gay." Such a Supportive Group if I may say so, in my Youth whenever I would have Fleeting Feelings, I would Feel a Front Door Open, not the Back, stranger since the Door happens to be a Wall in the Physical Plane. Perhaps the Phantom Pain is what my Sprit Desires above All Else.

I played Jak 2 again, this is my Favorite PS2 Game after all, there's something about Haven City that I feel is Incredibly Vivid, yet Somber at the Same Time. The Futuristic Technology and Architecture but the Dystopian Concept is a bit Grim. Fortunately Jak helps the Citizens in Jak 3 then Moves to Newer Places that Require his Help.

I also played Liberty City Stories again, I find this Ad rather Amusing and at the Same Time quite Reflective, seeing that the Internet, specifically the TG Community Maid me, well Not Completely as I ended up Having my Feelings for Several Years, but it Helped Forge the Words used to Describe my Inner Nature and Bring myself Out while Silencing him Forever.

The last game I played Tonight was Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, as I've said on my DeviantART numerous Times this is my Favorite Kingdom Hearts Game for Several Reasons, the Story is quite Beautiful and Explains Roxas's Origin as well as the First Time in the Series where Twilight Town Exists in a Non Card Generated sort of way. I prefer Twilight Town over Traverse Town, mostly due to Traverse being more Darker by Design, Twilight is rather Peaceful. It reminds me of when I saw my First Sunset, I was 3 at Daycare when I lived in Honesdale and I sat on the Hill and Watched it with Awe and Thoughtfulness, while the Other Kids would Play their Games. They Didn't Prefer my Company, even at a Young Age, I was Essentially Meant for a Smaller Circle of Friends. I always had a Difficult Time when it came to Relating to Boys and seeing that Linda wanted me to Socialize with them, you can Understand the Resentment I had towards her. In saying that when I brought my Barbies with me at 7, she Ensured I played Games with the Girls, Finally I felt like I was at Home. She did so to Attempt to Punish my Effeminacy but it Backfired on her.

I'm gonna get some Rest now, I have Therapy in the Morning and I believe it will be a Big Session for me. I'll write more in the Morning.-Elizabeth