Good late evening, we Returned home, Mom is currently Sleeping. I'm glad her 4 Miller Lites are Giving her Rest. I know all Too Well what Restlessness Feels like, it's Torment. Back when I was 19, I was part of a Activism Organization in Honesdale. I was the LGBTQ+ Representative for the Cultural and Linguistics Subcommittee in Wayne County Systems of Care. Such a Sophisticated Wording for such a Empty and Manipulative Puppet Position. My Goals with said Position were to Make HRT far more Accessible for the County. It was when my Presentation was Discarded and was Replaced by Jargon used like a Bandage instead of Quelling the Pain of those who Truly Suffer with even Looking in the Mirror on a Daily Basis. It Broke me Mentally where I Couldn't Sleep for 5 and 1/2 to 6 Days due to my Heart literally Aching from the Realization that the World will Always be Against me and Even those Deemed you Allies will Betray you if it Benefits them. It was then that I stated a Statement, that I personally didn't Agree with and then was Targeted by more of my So Called Friends that I slipped into the Shadows and Joined the Sissy Community and Found my Home with them. It's Strange Writing this has Given my Head a Pleasurable Lightheadedness, perhaps due to me Explaining my Fall from the Mainstream Rainbow as Extremely Cathartic. Holding onto such Resentments and Finally Releasing them even in Written Form feels Incredibly Soothing. My point being I can Understand the Necessity for a Good Night's Rest.
I played Super Mario Eclipse again and Choose to Play as my Favorite Character from the Game as well as Visited my Favorite Area in the Game. This Creek is Extraordinarily Peaceful, it reminds me of the Buck's Cove Road back in my Youth long before "Progress" Polluted the Water. The River was quite Refreshing as was the Waterfall as I would have the Stream's Water in a Bottle and Drink it on a Hot Summer's Day in 2001. It's a Shame that it became so Filthy, then again it has Proved something, Humanity Truly is quite Selfish.
I also played LEGO Island and decided to Confront a Fear that I had since I was 8, the Cave. I suppose my Fear of this Place was because the Music reminded me of when Optimus Prime flatlines in the Gen 1 Film, which I shall be Giving the DVD of to my Therapist this Thursday. Still a bit of Exposure Therapy can be Helpful from Time to Time. It's strange the Graphics make it Less Scary as well, come to Think of it, if I can Handle Ikana Canyon and The Shadow Temple, I think it's Fair to say, I can Deal with quite a lot of things Most Folks think are Unsettling. Even I may come Across as Strange to some of you, but hey I'm Elizabeth, I'm me and what you Read from me is What you Get as well as the Truth. The Truth can be Terrifying at times but you have to Face that Fear to Truly be Happy with Yourself as well as the World to a Certain Extent.
The last game I played tonight was WeThePixies, it's my Favorite Dead Disney MMO Servers, I tried to be Friendly and Strike up a Conversation but was Given the Cold Shoulder, either they are Not in a Good Mood or they're Possibly Bots. I'll lean on the Former as the Requirements to Have an Account in the Alpha Version of this Server is a CaF Code, I'm unsure what the Acronym stands For, perhaps my Therapist can Explain it Better for me, seeing that he Studied Computer Science. I'm just a Writer after all, I'm not too Good at Tech Stuff, I rely on Tutorials after all. I'm just Above Average, I'm Far from a Genius.
I'm gonna get some Rest now, I do have a Boring Tuesday so I'll write more in the Morning.-Elizabeth
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